Taken from real life. “My daughter started living with a man, and now he's breathing down her neck, he doesn't want to work”: She supports him, even though he's not even her husband

My daughter has terrible luck with men.

She is a pretty, slim, intelligent girl, but this makes her feel bad. In high school, she dated a boy. He was well-mannered, came from a decent family, his parents were very nice and intelligent people. But, like most teenagers that age, my daughter's personality was just awful. Even now it's not a gift, but back then it was a nightmare.

I think it was because of her character that they broke up. Then my daughter got involved with a guy from her college. He was in his final year. I liked him, he gave her flowers and gifts, he literally carried her in his arms. From what I know, he was from another city, he studied here and worked part-time. He earned his own living. “I don't want to hear about him anymore!” my daughter once said and they broke up. She didn't give any details, but again she wasn't happy with this guy.

She was single until she was almost 28. Of course she had admirers. As I said, she's a pretty, interesting girl. She got flowers and was taken home, she got attention, but she was in no hurry to start a serious relationship. As time went on, my daughter became sensible, she realized that she had to lower the bar, but I didn't think she would sink so low. It's about her new boyfriend. As I mentioned, my daughter is now 29 and her boyfriend is 35.

For me, this is the right time to start a family and have kids, but her boyfriend is in no rush. They've been together for over a year. He has his own one-room apartment, which I understand he inherited. Roman used to be married, but now he's divorced and has no kids and is in no rush to start a family again.

My daughter was initially resistant, but then she agreed to move in with him for a while. I was against it too, because they're not married yet, but my daughter said that Roman doesn't want to develop their relationship in any other way. Nowadays, of course, many people live this way and then get married, but many of my friends had negative experiences with such cohabitation, so I immediately didn't like the idea.

My daughter listened to me, but she did it her way. She told her boyfriend that she was ready to live with him in a civil marriage for no longer than a year, and then either marry him or break up.

He agreed to such an arrangement. Somehow I failed to become friends with my daughter's chosen one. My daughter, I didn't like this man from the very beginning. They lived together for a little less than a year, and then problems arose: Roman was fired from his job. I don't know exactly what the situation was, but my daughter supported him, saying that he could look for a new job and that for now she would be responsible for the finances.

Roman himself didn't even talk about marriage. I doubt he even remembers their agreement. He feels good: his chosen one cooks at home, does laundry, cleans, and now also supports him. Roman has not worked for over two months and does odd jobs. Before, my daughter often told me that they went to the cinema, cafes, and bought various things, but now she complains that her boyfriend's earnings are only enough to pay for utilities and maintain the car. Entertainment, gifts, and other small things are out of the question.

I don't know how to talk sense into my daughter, but somehow I have to convince her that this arrangement will not bring anything good to their relationship. This has been going on too long…

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