Real-life. “My mother trusts my nephews to take care of me in my old age”: I have to spend part of my income to help my sister's family

My mother's concern is understandable. My sister and her husband, who had two children in three years, still live with our mother.

My sister doesn't want to live with her mother-in-law because she doesn't like what's going on either and doesn't hide it, regularly lashing out at her son and daughter-in-law. But our mother doesn't do anything to her sister, she's her favorite daughter, who needs to be supported because she's so unlucky in life.

So my sister has no problem taking advantage of my mother's care. She came to her with her husband and said: “We'll live with you for a while”, and then she had two children and she's not going anywhere. I'm eight years older than my sister. I've been living separately for a long time and I have my own apartment, which I saved up for myself. I also have a partner, but we don't intend to register our relationship. Neither of us sees the point in it.

We each have our own property, job, business and we won't have children together, so why bother? I can't have children for medical reasons. There is no way, there is no option, even in vitro won't help. But I came to terms with these thoughts a long time ago, I had time for that.

So now I take this fact for granted, which has almost no impact on my life. It only pleases my bosses that I won't go on maternity leave at the most inconvenient time. I live in prosperity, I don't need anything more and I help my mother.

My mother, because I don't feel like helping my sister. Since childhood, we somehow can't communicate. My younger sister has never forgotten her role. My mother chased after her sister, trying to please her, because the younger one was born sickly. Instead of getting an education, which I was willing to pay for, my sister decided that she was already the smartest and would make a lot of money by getting tattoos.

Someone once told her she was good at drawing, and she believed it. With the money she had spent on college, my sister bought a tattoo machine, paints, and started pretending to be a cool artist. She even took two weeks of classes. I was furious. I told my mom that Anka didn't need this education, but my mom insisted that she did. I gave in, gave my mom the money to pay for everything, and for some reason she decided it would be a good idea to give it to my sister.

Anka's business didn't work out. She did free tattoos for herself and her desperate friends, then threw the machine in a drawer, dreaming of a career as a blogger. But then she also needed a fancy phone, a laptop, and a few other gadgets, which she borrowed money for, and her mother cried later and didn't know how she was going to pay them back.

My sister's husband pretends to work, I can't think of anything else to call it. My sister takes care of the kids, my mom works for the whole family, and my eyes twitch when my mom tells me about them. Recently, my mom started talking about a strange topic.

She said that since I won't have children of my own, it would be logical to consider my sister's children as my continuation, because they are my relatives. And since they are my continuation, I have to talk to my nephews. Like? For example, with a separate apartment.

Yes, my mom is quite seriously proposing to buy me an apartment for my sister and her family. But she knows that I wouldn't lift a finger for my sister, so she's leaving with my nephews. It's a strange move, considering I've only seen them a few times and never held them in my arms.

I haven't had the chance, my sister and I aren't on good terms, my mom thinks I should spend half of my income on my nephews so I can count on their help in my old age. Oh well, yeah, yeah, the oldest is about three, they'll understand, remember, and care. I told my mom that I'd be willing to spend money on my nephews if my sister and her husband died and my mom got custody. Then, yes, I wouldn't have a choice, but for now I have this choice and I'll stand aside.

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