Real-Life. “I'm Forty-Five and My Mother-in-Law Still Nags Me”: She Says I'm a Bad Housewife

I always thought that by the time I turned forty-five, I would finally be able to become a housewife that my family would be proud of.

I managed to build a career, have two children, and settle down with my husband. When we are alone, everything is fine. But as soon as my mother-in-law comes over, the atmosphere in the house changes beyond recognition. Every time she crosses the threshold, there's tension in the air.

I don't even have time to greet her before she starts her lecture:

– You don't understand that children should only eat home-cooked food? If you feed them semi-finished products, they'll grow up to be underdeveloped! – she tells me, pointing to the box of frozen food. I try not to react to such remarks, even though everything inside me is boiling.

She says her friends' daughters cook three meals a day for dinner, and their houses are clean, they raise their children, and they go to work out. And I don't have time for anything! I find myself getting more and more irritated every time I hear about someone's perfect order – I already have enough to deal with my kids and work without trying to chase someone else.

One evening my husband, the kids, and I were cooking dinner when my mother-in-law came to visit. I was testing out a new recipe – pasta with vegetables and chicken. I cooked with my heart that day. But as soon as my mother-in-law entered, her eyes darted around the kitchen and landed on the pan.

– What kind of food is this? – she asked. – You could have cooked something healthy for the kids.

– Mom, that's enough – said her husband. But Anna only snorted and answered him:

– I take care of you and the grandchildren!

– And I don't take care of them ? – I gasped.

– Well, you do – said my mother-in-law. And then it broke. I thought how much longer I would have to endure this ? I am not a girl anymore and I have to be afraid that my mother-in-law will say an extra word ? I deserve respect for everything I do.

– Anna, I'm tired of this – I said. You were always comparing me to someone else and telling my son what a bad wife, mother and housewife I was.

– Luckily? – my mother-in-law got up – because of you, my son has been living with a clumsy idiot his whole life! You have no time for anything! The house is dusty, you cook with semi-finished products, you don't take care of yourself. I got up at five in the morning to cook breakfast and tidy up. And in the evening I went to bed later than everyone else to wash the dishes, iron the laundry and clean the apartment. You're good for nothing!

These insulting words made my throat tighten. I felt tears welling up in my eyes and was about to burst into tears when my husband suddenly intervened.

– Okay, Mom, that's enough! – he said sharply. – My wife is the most wonderful wife and mother in the world. I love her very much and I don't need another wife.

– You only say that because you don't know anyone else! – my mother-in-law shouted. – But if you had married Alice, like I said…

– I never loved Alice! – my husband shouted. – And I'm not interested in a stupid housewife who has no brain and no interests other than pleasing me. I'd rather my wife sleep two hours longer in the morning, but not have to run around at five in the morning like you do for my father. How it ended? He never appreciated you anyway! I love and appreciate my wife.

After that conversation, my mother-in-law ran out of our apartment like she was scalded. I realized how much I love my husband. And it was so nice that he stood up for me. And that I was perfect for him, despite my imperfections.

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