When I was a child, I didn't know that what I felt was not love – just fear dressed up for gratitude. < img src = "https://zycie.news/crops/6c4077/620x0/1/0/2025/03/22/9yakkzv0mb0mb02mrl0nvqs022txvxdu1mobwwwwwoxdv.jpg" alt = "old lady @pexels" Style = "background-color: rgba (54.54.54.1)" > < p > my mother had a gift & ndash; She could make me feel literally for everything.
< p > for smiling. < p > for having my own opinion.< p > for wanting to be more than a shadow.
< p > — I devoted my life to you! & Amp; MDASH; She shouted when I wanted to go to another city.
< p > — Why do you need it ? that you are smarter than me ?< p > I stayed.
< p > I rejected the chances. < p > I gave up. < p > because the mother always knew better.< p > A if PR & oacute; I was to rebel — turned on tears, diseases, offended silence.
< p > I couldn't leave.
< p > I got married p & oacute;For a man who was my shelter.
< p > but it bother her.
< p > — You will see, leave you. Every guy finally leaves. < p > began to call every day.< p > control.
< p > criticize.
< p > and I know & oacute; in
< p > because the fault was stronger than freedom.
< p > And now … now the mother is sick.
< p > is lonely. Helpless.
< p > and expects me to throw everything to take care of her. < p > because I am her C & Amp; Oacute; RKI. < p > because “mother has only one”.< p > because I owe her everything.
< p > but I don't feel gratitude.
< p > I feel b & oacute; l, regret, burn.
< p > I feel that she took my life, and now I want to finish it with me. < p > — You can't leave me. < p > — You have always been an egoist. < p > — I did not give birth to you to turn from me & oacute; 60 ~/p > < p > I hear these words every day.< p > but now something has changed in me.
< p > now I know that I'm not an egoist.
< p > I am a woman who for the first time pries to save herself.< p > I help her.
< p > but on my terms. < p > I don't live with her.< p > I don't let myself rule.
< p > I don't let her remorse poison my heart again. < p > because if I have something else to save — it's yourself. < p > and I do not feel guilty.< p > because not everything maternal is good.
< p > sometimes you have to cut yourself off to finally breathe m & c