When I got married, I was sure I found the love of my life. < img src = "https://zycie.news/crrops/e2be9b/620x0/1/0/2025/03/11/w582km15unji6chcwomwcebsdzdzdz9fohyw1fohywa13bqk6y.jpg" alt = "woman @pexels" styles = "background-color: rgba (88,94,67,1)" > < p > m & oacute; Jer was a farmer & ndash; strong, hard -working, respected in the village. In his eyes I saw warmly, in his hands strength, and in his words the promise of the future of the future.
< p > I thought it would be like in movies & ndash; Walks in the fields, candlelit dinners, the smell of cut hay and romantic evenings under the starry sky.< p > but life quickly showed me how wrong I was.
< p > first morning after marriage.
< p > I thought I would wake up in his arms, that he would be lazy, sensitive morning.
< p > but he was already in the field. < p > I was alone in the cold & oacute; Żku. < p > — He did not even manage to say & ampquo; good morning & rdquo; & Amp; MDASH; I sighed, glancing at my watch. < p > sz & oacute; stable in the morning.< p > The next days were getting heavier.
< P >& Amp; MDASH; Pom & oacute; in the barn — he said one day. < p > I have never dealt with cows before. I have always imagined life in the countryside as something picturesque, but the smell, mud and endless duties quickly brought me to the ground. < p > — I have to do it ? — I asked, pr & oacute; not to let me know disgust. < p > — We are a family. Everyone works. < p > I said nothing, but inside I began to understand that my dreams of romantic life were only dreams.< p > days merged into one.
< p > wake up at dawn, animal feeding, work in the field, cleaning the farm. < p > There was no time for candlelit dinners, for long conversations, to hold hands while walking & oacute; w.< p > There was only fatigue.
< p > — Honey, maybe tonight we will come out somewhere ? — I asked one day, hoping that we would finally find a moment only for ourselves.< p > looked at me with a tired eyes.
< p > — We don't have time for this.
< p > We didn't have time for us. < p > months passed.< p > I looked at myself in the mirror and saw a completely different woman than the one I was before the wedding.
< p > somewhere a girl disappeared who dreamed of romantic life.< p > left a woman who worked from dawn to dusk, who was cracked from hard work and the heart was increasingly empty.
< p > Did I love my husband ?
< p > yes
< p > but is it enough when there is no place in it for closeness ?
< p > I didn't know.
< p > and I was more and more afraid of answering.