A year ago, the happiest event in my life took place — our daughter, Alina, was born.

Real-Life Story: 'Mother-in-Law Doesn't Accept Her Granddaughter': Still Desperate to Look Younger at 58

Now this little person is a whole year old! Our daughter is the meaning of my life, everything now revolves around her. My husband and I simply can't get enough of her! Oskar is four years older than me, so he really wanted a child and was ready for parenthood.

He spends all his free time with Alina and calls her “his princess”. The birth of a granddaughter was a very happy event for my parents, but it's not the first time – my older brother has a daughter who is 5 years old – for my in-laws it was a source of anxiety.

My mother-in-law, Helena, is no ordinary woman. She works in the cosmetics industry, in a small cosmetics company. As a result, her entire life is subordinated to various beauty rituals, and when she talks about her age, she always subtracts at least five years from her age.

I remember that when we met in the maternity hospital, my father-in-law turned to his wife with a laugh:

– Well, grandma, take your granddaughter!

– Don't call me that! – she replied, even flinching. After the birth I didn’t pay much attention to it, but then I noticed how in conversation my husband’s mother would only call Alinka by her first name or as a girl, but never as her granddaughter. It was very strange!

Well, someone should teach this young grandmother her new role. We decided to celebrate Alinka’s first birthday at my parents’ country house – a large house outside the city.

When I found myself next to my mother-in-law during my timid movements in the garden, I asked:

-Why don’t you hug your granddaughter?

-Zuza, don't say that – Osjar's mother admonished me.

-Girl? – I asked sarcastically.

-Let her get used to calling me simply Helena. True, my good? – she replied, taking Alinka in her arms.

Well, she's just an inscrutable woman! At the holiday table, when the conversation turned to summer vacation, my father suggested that we move to a summer house for two months, where there is plenty of space and there will always be someone to take care of our granddaughter.

-We were also thinking of inviting you to our summer house, but of course we have less space. It will be uncomfortable with a little girl, my mother-in-law began to say.

-With what little girl, Elena Rodionovna? What do you mean, with what little girl?

-With your daughter, my husband's mother replied calmly.

-Well, daughter, is she just a girl to you? – I continued.

Oskar took me from the table to the garden, where he lectured me on the fact that it doesn't matter what his mother calls our child, the important thing is whether she loves it or not. I think that if my mother-in-law is so dishonest and wants to be infinitely young, does she need to communicate with her granddaughter?

If she is not ready to be a grandmother, how can I trust her? Let's say she goes with a child and thinks about her hairstyle instead of her granddaughter? I am very worried about this! And it is not about my hormones, but about normal motherly concern.

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Natasha Kumar

By Natasha Kumar

Natasha Kumar has been a reporter on the news desk since 2018. Before that she wrote about young adolescence and family dynamics for Styles and was the legal affairs correspondent for the Metro desk. Before joining The Times Hub, Natasha Kumar worked as a staff writer at the Village Voice and a freelancer for Newsday, The Wall Street Journal, GQ and Mirabella. To get in touch, contact me through my natasha@thetimeshub.in 1-800-268-7116