The apartment my son is talking about belongs to my husband's mother, my mother-in-law.
Mother-in-law is unable to move. My husband and I still work, and our salaries aren't high enough to allow us to stay home and take care of an old lady all day.
We wouldn't have enough money for anything, and being bedridden is a huge expense. We took my mother-in-law in, did some minor renovations to her apartment, and started renting it out. This is a huge help for us, because without this money we simply can't cover all our expenses.
We have no hope for our son, because he barely has enough money for himself, or rather for his family. And the family is already quite large: he, his wife, and two children, the oldest of whom is a year and a half old. Our son is only twenty, as is his wife. Neither of them has any education, of course, but they feel old enough to start a family.
The daughter-in-law never worked. She got into college, got pregnant, and went on maternity leave, the first smoothly transitioning into the second. Our son also dropped out of school because both we and the in-laws refused to feed the new social unit. Our son would throw tantrums.
So we would have to take our son and his family on our backs so that the boy could study peacefully. Of course, my son didn't like this approach, but he couldn't do anything. He had to go to work, rent an apartment, and support the family. We couldn't take young people – grandma is bedridden, and my daughter-in-law's parents live with their two younger children and have nowhere to put three more people.
I understand that it's hard for my son, but he chose this life. What's more, he made the situation even more complicated, because while the first pregnancy could have been survived, the second pregnancy in a row is clearly a conscious choice. But it's easier for my son to blame all of us for not helping him. He says that because of us he didn't even get an education, so he can't find a good job, and he started talking about the apartment again.
He pointed out that we rent it to strangers, while he and his family wander around rented rooms. My husband said that if they agreed to live with their grandmother and take care of her, they could move into her apartment. My son was outraged, arguing that they had children and they should get the most attention. That was the end of our discussion on the subject. Let them manage on their own…
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