Author of bestsellerStop being nice, be honest !, sold more than a million copies and translated into 17 languages, Thomas D’Ansembourg proposes to reassess and reformat old ways of thinking to adapt to reality in his new book. Does our way of being an adult make sense and envy young people? dissects the ways of doing things that no longer have their place and proposes new avenues that are much richer in meaning and fulfilling. In his opinion, adults must become “watchmen and wakeers” for the young.
With kindness, the specialist in non-violent communication explains that relationships based on power struggles, mistrust and division no longer have their raison d’être and do not resonate at all among young people.
Rather, he proposes to embody in the eyes of the young generation models that emphasize mutual aid, healthy communication, empathy, confidence, a sense of responsibility. Important values to be transmitted so that this generation can in turn become inspired and inspiring adults.
The pandemic has caused awareness and significant changes in mentalities. “This is what I aspire with all my heart: that it comes to shake us in our individual lives. I see, as a therapist and accompanying for almost 25 years, that we are changing for two reasons, ”he explains, in an interview from Belgium.
“Either we ourselves feel that our life is no longer suitable for us, and we put in place a process of change to realign ourselves to our momentum of life, which in my work I call our common thread. It takes a little while, but little by little we are getting to be who we want. Either, we resist the signs which have nevertheless indicated to us for a long time that we were not aligned on our red thread, that we needed to change. But we didn’t listen to them. ”
What happens then? A shock comes to shake us. “It’s an illness, an accident, a painful divorce or a painful dismissal that all of a sudden comes to sit on our butt and ask ourselves these fundamental questions. Who I am? Where am I going? What is life for? ”
A big slap
He thinks that we are currently experiencing a big slap in the face “to wake us up from our collective hypnosis in the capitalist consumer society.”
Are we already starting to see signs of change? “This constraint is perhaps an opportunity for awakening. I have the opportunity to meet many young people who seize this period both to understand that we are letting go of things, of leaving things, and that a new world is to be co-built on new ones. bases. And so, they want to contribute to it. They feel there is potential. ”
However, he specifies that he suspects that for many young people, the current period is rather lived in the distress of losing bearings and not really knowing how to find new ones.
“It is for this reason that I wrote my new book: so that adults may be watchmen and awakeners in this darkness that we pass through.”
In his opinion, the “adult” model presented in Western societies is no longer suitable for young people. “It is clear that today we are witnessing something historic.”
“Young people, at least in Europe, are arriving en masse in the streets demonstrating, with the Greta Thunberg generation, to say to adults: please be responsible! Be aware! Be realistic and let go of your utopias of exponential economic growth and come back with respect for reality. ”
♦ Thomas D’Ansembourg was a lawyer in Brussels, legal advisor in business and leader of an association for young people in difficulty.
♦ He became a psychotherapist and trainer in human relations.
♦ Since 1994, he has been teaching non-violent communication according to the Marshall Rosenberg process.
♦ He presents conferences on the subject in Europe, Quebec and Morocco.
Natasha Kumar has been a reporter on the news desk since 2018. Before that she wrote about young adolescence and family dynamics for Styles and was the legal affairs correspondent for the Metro desk. Before joining The Times Hub, Natasha Kumar worked as a staff writer at the Village Voice and a freelancer for Newsday, The Wall Street Journal, GQ and Mirabella. To get in touch, contact me through my firstname.lastname@example.org 1-800-268-7116