My daughter-in-law has come up with a way to avoid work and still do nothing at home.

From real life. "I contribute to the family budget, so I share the household chores": My daughter-in-law says

My son is working his ass off, he comes home and he's already tired, and my wife, who's been doing something for her own pleasure all day, says it's not her turn to cook dinner. She has an idea – she rents her apartment, so this is her contribution to the family budget. Since she also earns, she should share the household chores to make it fair.

I don't understand why my son still puts up with this. He married Olga five years ago. He had an apartment, so the young couple immediately started living separately from their parents. Both worked in the family and both did the household chores. My son is not used to shifting all the household chores onto his wife, my husband and I taught him this by our own example.

He can cook, clean, iron – he knows how to do all this and has no problems with it. Before the wedding, I reminded him that he was getting married, not hiring a cleaner, nanny or cook, and not to get on his wife's nerves. My daughter-in-law was present at this conversation and was very pleased. She quickly became pregnant and during that time all the household chores fell to my son.

The most difficult time for Olga was summer, when even healthy people did not feel well because of the heat, and she, poor thing, could not raise her head at all because she was so sore. I tried to come and help whenever possible, but I tried not to impose. But I made cutlets, pancakes, crepes, or something else tasty and took them to the young ones.

During maternity leave, my son also behaved with dignity. He looked after the child, cleaned and did everything else on an equal basis with his wife, and at the same time worked. They did not quarrel, did not get bogged down in everyday life, and the grandson was healthy and did not cause any trouble. He also went to kindergarten calmly when Olga returned to work.

About a year ago, Olga inherited the apartment where her father lived. The apartment was nothing extraordinary – an ordinary two-room apartment with average repairs and furniture. But the condition was to “move in and live”, as they say. Young people do not need such an apartment, they themselves live in a two-room apartment, which is also better renovated and furnished, so they decided to rent it.

The first few times things went wrong, but they were lucky with the third tenants. A couple moved in who had been looking for an apartment for a long time. They have been living there for a long time and pay rent regularly. When the rent money started coming in regularly, Olga decided to quit her job. According to the official version, she did this because she had been planning to change her field of activity for a long time.

She stayed at home, her grandson went to kindergarten, and her son went to work. My daughter-in-law seemed to be looking for job offers that would suit her. However, time passed and she found no offers. She clearly wasn't looking for them, because after a while she decided that she was contributing to the family budget, i.e. money from the rent. If you are a housewife, that's also good. The child won't grow up with a latchkey around his neck, and you'll spoil your husband with pickles” – I pressed, although I thought that money in their family was a great thing.

And then my daughter-in-law surprised me – it turned out that being a housewife wasn't in her plans. She justified that a housewife is a woman who does everything at home by herself, and she didn't want to be one.

-Why should I take on everything? Do I bring income to the family? Yes, I do. It doesn't matter how, the most important thing is that I do. This means that we will still share the responsibilities with my husband. Why should I bring money and be left alone with everything? – she said Olga.

I thought she was joking, but then it turned out she was completely serious. My son was getting ready for work, and she was writing him a shopping list and reminding him that it was his turn to cook dinner. I couldn't believe it, how is that possible? She has to take her son to kindergarten and pick him up. She doesn't cook every day, and once a week they clean together.

Nothing has changed in their lives, except that my daughter-in-law is home now. I still hold back, I don't express my opinion, even though I really want to. I want to approach her and ask her if she's not ashamed in front of her husband, but I don't think she has even a shred of shame…

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Natasha Kumar

By Natasha Kumar

Natasha Kumar has been a reporter on the news desk since 2018. Before that she wrote about young adolescence and family dynamics for Styles and was the legal affairs correspondent for the Metro desk. Before joining The Times Hub, Natasha Kumar worked as a staff writer at the Village Voice and a freelancer for Newsday, The Wall Street Journal, GQ and Mirabella. To get in touch, contact me through my natasha@thetimeshub.in 1-800-268-7116